A Prayer to an Old Friend

Oh, Rain, do you recall how I've whimsically chanted, many times before, the voodoo that pleads for you to, "go away and come again another day?" Well, today is that day, my friend! Come, come to California, MD and linger for just a while, for I wish to play with you this day. My jet has many fears and anxieties - one of them being a fear of heights - but none so great as the Global Hawk's fear of rain, snow, ice, and frost. Grant this bird of sight another day of rest before its long journey to a distant land. With your warm touch, be a blanket to us, here and now, and paint the sky with overcast. And, if you so will it - freeze this sky over the Patuxent River, so that many well-meaning, ugly people, those of whom were told to long await this day by the shallow and evil ones their hearts desire most, can finally get dates.

A Deal with the Blimey Deep

I travled far (14 miles THAT way) to Mechanicsville, MD, by minivan, and I made a pact with six, Old Bay-seasoned, blue crabs last night. In exchange for their soft, buttery innards, they would inflict small slices and punctures upon my hands, those of which I would not yet be aware of until I came across something citrus-y... like the lime atop the bottle of my corona.